Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
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