Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
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