Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
