This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
