Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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