butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
