I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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