Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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