You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
