is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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