Dual....:-)
It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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