Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
