Christians are straight up FREAKS
I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
