the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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