So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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