my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
why is half of my head shaved?
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