Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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