pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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