Can Purell be used as lube?
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
He had one of those small greek statue penises
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
