I'm drive I can fine osifer
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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