Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
