where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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