i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
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