I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
