I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
