in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Randomize
