I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
