why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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