there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
You took a bar mat shot.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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