How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
