I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
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