farters have to be the big spoon...
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
