How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
