Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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