talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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