What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
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