just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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