Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
