I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
