Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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