She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I have aggressive nipples.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Randomize
