I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Randomize
