we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize