They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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