Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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