remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Terrible idea I love it
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
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