whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Randomize
