My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
