Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
