I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
